Wednesday, March 4, 2009

The Ten Commandments Of Tools

1. Thou shalt keep thy cutting tools sharp. Dull drills, plane blades, and other cutters make the baby Proto cry.

2. Thou shalt keep thy tools clean. Grit in your ratchet handle will sooner or later cause that ratchet to slip, resulting in injured knuckles. Some sects name this phenomena "karma".

3. Thou shalt keep thy moving mechanisms lubricated. Surfaces which rub against one another require appropriate lubrication. The Old Mechanic With An Oily Rag has not absented himself from our midst. He walks among us unseen, watching to see whether we oil our ways, grease our bearings, and employ appropriate unguents when cutting or drilling. Emulate him.

4. Thou shalt not worship false (ie; cheap) tools. Seek with thy heart and thy brain, and the true tools worthy of thy love shall be revealed to you. Shun the inferior tool. Shop not at Harbor Freight, Tool King, nor other purveyors of lesser tools.

5. Thou shall not touch they neighbor's tools without asking permission, lest thy neighbor chop off thine hand without asking permission.

6. If thou borroweth tools, thou shalt return them in better condition than when thou receiveth them.

7. Honor thy wrench and thy hammer so that they may serve you in good stead for all thy days and they children's days to come. Abuse them not. Pry not with the screwdriver, bash not with the wrench, for these are forbidden acts. Neither shall thee cast aside thy tools in anger, for they shall become damaged, and return the favor upon thy hands and fingers soon after.

8. 0.5 inches is not 12 mm, neither is it 13.

9. Cool thine forge before getting thy buzz on.

10. Thou shalt honor thy fatigue, and rest when thou art exhausted, lest thy tools seem to gain life of their own and draw thine blood.

The last three were suggested by friends

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